Collection : 38 Great Funny Minion Quotes

August 17, 2020, 6:29 pm 64.7k Views

The best funny minion quotes ever! Minions are so cute in their looks and funny in actions. The Minions movie is all about the lovable, Enjoy, Entertain and Laugh with Funny quotes and Sayings. Minions live in our hearts because of their cuteness and they are part of our daily life.

1. “My doctor asked me if I had ever had a stress test? Yes – I replied it’s called life”

2. “Only for Geniuses;-) If: 2 = 6 3 = 12 4 = 20 5 = 30 6 = 42 Then 9 – ??”

3. “You wanna travel so bad that you didn’t notice this was a cake”

4. “Story of my life Monday – Ughhh it’s Monday Tuesday – Well at least its Tuesday. Wednesday – Wow, its already Wednesday Thursday – Hey, tomorrow’s Friday! Friday – 😀 yes weekend! Saturday – – party – Sunday – CRAP tomorrow’s Monday”

5. “I don’t always tolerate stupid people, but when I do, I’m probably at work…”

6. “It’s nice to have someone in your life who can make you smile even when they’re not around.”

7. “Pressing a toy that says ‘Try me’ at the store and it won’t stop, so you just awkwardly walk away like nothing happened.”

8. “H.O.M.E.W.O.R.K.= Half of my energy wasted on random knowledge…”

9. “Do you ever wake up in the morning and just think ‘No, I’m not ready for this shit’”

10. “Maybe money can’t buy happiness, but I think it’s only fair to give me some and let me learn that lesson myself.”

Top Hilarious Minions Quotes | funny memes – funny pictures

11. “If sleep is good for the brain, why is it not allowed in school?”

12. “I spent my entire childhood wishing I was older now I’m older… and it sucks”

13. “If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn’t contain any calories.”

14. “A strong person is not the one who doesn’t cry. A strong person is one who is quiet and sheds tears for a moment. And then picks up the sword and fights again.”

15. “I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like: “Just kidding””

16. “Don’t give me your attitude unless you want mine!!”

17. “I am in one of those moods where I just want to throw a book at someone’s face and be like: “I Facebooked you.””

18. “If a woman says, “Do what you want,” do not do what you want. Stand still, don’t blink, don’t answer, don’t even breathe. Just play dead.”

19. “Sometimes, I forget how to spell a word so I change the whole sentence to avoid using it.”

20. “The biggest lie I tell myself is: “I don’t need to write it down, I’ll remember it””

Hilarious Minions Quotes | funny memes – funny images

21. “Attention! I am out of order until further notice. My “Stupid people” filter needs cleaning and my “Give a damn” batteries have run out.”

22. “I’m not crazy, I’m just special! ….no, wait….. maybe I am crazy? One second….. I have to talk to myself about this, hold on….”

23. “I will slap you so hard even Google wont be able to find you”

24. “If Dorothy can click her heels together and get to Kansas then why can’t I click my flip flops together and get to the beach?”

25. “Being able to respond with sarcasm within seconds of a stupid question is a sign of a healthy brain.”

26. “When you have a good heart: you help too much, you trust too much, you give too much, you love too much, and it always seems like you’re the one who gets hurt the most.”

27. “If we’re not mean to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge???”

28. “Math the only place where people buy 64 watermelons and no one wonders why…”

29. “When I die, I want my tombstone to offer free WIFI, just so people will visit more often.”

30. “Best friends : You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You fall, I laugh then I fall too because I was laughing so hard.”

Hilarious funny Minions Quotes | funny sayings – funny images

31. “I would like to think I would die a heroic death, but it’s more likely I’ll trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.”

32. “If you rearrange the letters earth it becomes heart. So even if someone we love is no longer on earth with us, we know that person will always be in our heart.”

33. “My doctor asked if any members of my family suffered from insanity, I replied, no, we all seem to enjoy it.”

34. “Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.”

35. “I love everybody. Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others I would love to punch in the face.”

36. “Human logic: Cut the trees made paper with them and write “Save the trees””

37. “My teacher pointed me with his ruler and said: “At the end of this ruler there’s an idiot!” I got detention after asking which end.”

38. “When you’re stressed, you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.”

39. “I live on the corner of funny street and silly road, in crazy town which is in psycho valley, in a twisted state of mind”

40. “Smart cars, smart TVs, smart phones… When will they start making smart people?”